Divided Generations

Over the past few days, I’ve been thinking a lot about what I call the « inter-generational crisis ». Even if sometimes the generations are not in open conflict, it’s clear that my generation (those in their twenties)1 and my parents’ generation (or above) rarely find themselves in the pews together. More and more young people are going to « youth churches », and the older ones find themselves a generation younger in their congregations. What are we to make of this? Why is it that, even for young people who want to commit themselves to the faith, they don’t find themselves in the churches where they grew up? As someone who belongs to a « historic » church, I often wonder why people my age shun these types of churches? Clearly, a number of factors come into play. The one I’d like to highlight first and foremost, and which seems to me the most important, is the difference in the way faith is practiced2.

My parents’ generation was very much marked by a strong separation between what is private and what is public. In other words, in their way of thinking, faith is something private that you don’t talk much about to others. So, of course, when it comes to evangelism, there’s an obligation to do so. However, we can see that in the Church, people keep their faith life essentially to themselves. Since they don’t talk about their spiritual struggles, the framework or form of faith has become very important. When you don’t know what’s going on in other people’s hearts, it’s important to look at their actions. This generation will therefore place a very strong emphasis on the following points: waiting for marriage before sexual relations, starting a family, not having abortions, criticizing bad forms of sexuality (concubinage, homosexuality, trans-gender, etc.), and so on. In such cases, form sometimes takes precedence over inner life.

My generation, on the other hand, was heavily influenced by post-modern ideas. Growing up, they were taught that the Church was all about hypocrisy, and that what was important was self-expression and acceptance of one’s emotions3. Here, the separation between private and public was deemed wrong because it led to abuse and hypocrisy in the Church. In my parents’ generation so many people lived the « form » of Christianity without having a heart for God. This has led my generation to reject all that is formal in the Church. As a result, many young people are leaving the historic churches because they don’t see the emotional expression that is so dear to them. It is also under the influence of these ideas that some people claim to be Christians while living a life that does not correspond to the biblical « framework ». The most striking example is that of cohabitation, where I have the impression of being one of the only young people in the world to wait until marriage to have sexual relations.

Towards a solution

What does all this tell us? How can we reconcile two generations who no longer live their faith together? Often, our natural tendency is to tell young people that they must respect traditions and be submissive to their elders, or to let them live their faith as they wish. By reacting in this way, we either make our young people tense up (in the first case) or lose them forever by letting them live a spirituality that resembles Christianity but distances them from Christ (in the second case). While I agree that the Bible teaches submission to elders and that traditions are important, I don’t think this is the angle to take.

The first step in the process of reconciling generations is to realize that the Bible doesn’t so much separate the private from the public. Jesus and the apostles are not ashamed to show their emotions or their struggles. Paul even explains that it’s an integral part of his ministry: « Therefore I will much more gladly boast of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me » (2 Cor 12:9). Young people won’t return to our churches until they see a faith sincerely lived out, until they find a community where struggles are shared and the Holy Spirit is at work. This expressiveness of faith does not mean that we should abandon the biblical framework, as young people have done and continue to do. The Bible provides a framework for a reason! But only if young people see a genuine love for God will they be ready to accept that framework. I myself wanted to devote my life to God because I saw people sacrificing their time, their money and their desires for God. If it hadn’t been for these people, I’d probably never have been able to accept the framework of life that the Bible gives us. Because I’ve seen people live the Christian faith, I know it’s viable and good. So may we live as role models for our young people. May we show them what true forgiveness, love, confession, sacrifice and dedication to God look like. When we live this out in our communities and families, there’s no doubt they’ll be challenged, and many will return to our churches living in a biblical framework.

1 When I talk about my generation or that of my parents, the boundaries are not hermetic. Some people from my parents’ generation will agree more with my description of youth, and vice-versa. I myself am a good example, as I’m a young intern pastor in a historic church.

2 I got some of my ideas from preacher Bryan Chapell. He talks about these ideas in one of his courses on inter-generational preaching (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKQ9sjAjj9Q).

3 When we talk about self-acceptance, we lose all concept of sin. God loves us as we are, but he doesn’t want us to stay that way. His love leads us to change our imperfections, our sins.